Heart Connex Parents Page - May 25-28, 2011
Truth Flowing from One Generation to the Next—Through Strong Heart Connections
PA R ENTS PAGE May 25-28, 2011 Communicating with Assertiveness—Richard Ross, Ph.D. **SPECIAL NOTE: Beginning in July 2011, Heart Connex will discontinue its email delivery, but families will still be able to access the devotions at www.lifeway.com/heartconnex. 1. Heart Surprise (Today a parent goes first): Say: It makes me sad to hear adults cut down teenagers. There are a lot of things I love about teens. One of the things I love most about people your age is . . . 2. Read Scripture: Invite a family member to pray. Ask family members to read Ephesians 4:15, 25, and 29. Discuss the Truth and Untruths in light of these verses. Truth • A believer’s words should be firm and honest, but also spoken in love. Untruths • Only mean people take an assertive tone. • You have to protect your friends and family because they can’t handle honesty. • It’s usually better to bury your emotions than to express how you feel. 3. Explore Scripture: Explain that when someone has hurt, angered, or grieved us, we have a responsibility to tell that person how we feel. Ask your family members to examine today’s verses for clues to speaking firmly, but in a way that honors Christ. Say: We are called to speak truthfully (vv. 15, 25). We are called to speak in love (v. 15). We called are to speak only what helps others and builds them up (v. 29). We are commanded to avoid words that hurt unnecessarily (v. 29). 4. Think It Through: A teenager will lead this step. 5. Nail It Down: Highlight the difference between assertive speech (which seeks to build up) and aggressive speech (which tends to tear down). Ask family members to identify the following examples as either aggressive or assertive speech: • Trying to impose your own ideas on others. (Aggressive) • Attacking others with harsh words. (Aggressive) • Standing up for your rights in a way that does not violate the rights of others. (Assertive) • Trying to manipulate others through guilt. (Aggressive) • Attacking a person instead of a behavior. (Aggressive) • Realizing that not expressing your feelings fails to help anyone. (Assertive) 6. Pray: A teenager will lead this prayer. 7. Blessing: Say: I bless this family as we focus on using assertive and loving words. Parent Tip: Consider turning off the television during meals. Families that watch TV during mealtimes tend to be more dysfunctional than families who spend that time talking and building relationships. The influence of and exposure to media in that setting anesthetizes a deeper lack of communication. Copyright © 2011 LifeWay Christian Resources of the Southern Baptist Convention
PA R ENTS PAGE May 25-28, 2011 Communicating with Assertiveness—Richard Ross, Ph.D. **SPECIAL NOTE: Beginning in July 2011, Heart Connex will discontinue its email delivery, but families will still be able to access the devotions at www.lifeway.com/heartconnex. 1. Heart Surprise (Today a parent goes first): Say: It makes me sad to hear adults cut down teenagers. There are a lot of things I love about teens. One of the things I love most about people your age is . . . 2. Read Scripture: Invite a family member to pray. Ask family members to read Ephesians 4:15, 25, and 29. Discuss the Truth and Untruths in light of these verses. Truth • A believer’s words should be firm and honest, but also spoken in love. Untruths • Only mean people take an assertive tone. • You have to protect your friends and family because they can’t handle honesty. • It’s usually better to bury your emotions than to express how you feel. 3. Explore Scripture: Explain that when someone has hurt, angered, or grieved us, we have a responsibility to tell that person how we feel. Ask your family members to examine today’s verses for clues to speaking firmly, but in a way that honors Christ. Say: We are called to speak truthfully (vv. 15, 25). We are called to speak in love (v. 15). We called are to speak only what helps others and builds them up (v. 29). We are commanded to avoid words that hurt unnecessarily (v. 29). 4. Think It Through: A teenager will lead this step. 5. Nail It Down: Highlight the difference between assertive speech (which seeks to build up) and aggressive speech (which tends to tear down). Ask family members to identify the following examples as either aggressive or assertive speech: • Trying to impose your own ideas on others. (Aggressive) • Attacking others with harsh words. (Aggressive) • Standing up for your rights in a way that does not violate the rights of others. (Assertive) • Trying to manipulate others through guilt. (Aggressive) • Attacking a person instead of a behavior. (Aggressive) • Realizing that not expressing your feelings fails to help anyone. (Assertive) 6. Pray: A teenager will lead this prayer. 7. Blessing: Say: I bless this family as we focus on using assertive and loving words. Parent Tip: Consider turning off the television during meals. Families that watch TV during mealtimes tend to be more dysfunctional than families who spend that time talking and building relationships. The influence of and exposure to media in that setting anesthetizes a deeper lack of communication. Copyright © 2011 LifeWay Christian Resources of the Southern Baptist Convention
