The Power of Grace Dr. Jim Denison
The Power of Grace Dr. Jim Denison Matthew 18:15-35 March 23, 2014 PK Harbor Chapel
March Madness is all in the news, as college basketball playoffs begin. Perhaps you've heard of the "Warren Buffett $1 Billion Challenge"—if a person correctly predicted all 67 games of the playoffs, he or she would win $1 billion. Some 8.7 million people entered. As of today, all of them are out. None has predicted each game correctly. Many people think God is like Warren Buffett—if you make a mistake, you can never again experience his perfect will. His plan for us is like a high wire; once you fall off, you can never get back on. The truth is just the opposite: God forgives all we confess, by grace. Now he wants us to extend his forgiveness to a world in desperate need of such love. Who is the person who has hurt you most deeply or recently? Who is the person you think of first when I ask you for someone you need to forgive? Let's ask Jesus to help us do just that.
Choose grace We've been discussing ways to bless our broken world, to respond to the rising rejection of Christianity in our day. We've noted Richard Dawkins' claim that "religion is the root of all evil" and Christopher Hitchens' assertion that "religion poisons everything." Last Monday I spoke on this subject to a pastors' group in Dallas. Afterwards, one of them told me about the atheist group in Rowlett that is attacking his church. Another told me that a local grocery store refused to recognize their tax-exempt status, simply because they are a church. How do we make a difference in a culture like this? Matthew 18 contains Jesus' instructions to his disciples on the way to his crucifixion and their persecution. The principles that prepared them will prepare us. We've learned so far the importance of humility, trusting Jesus every day as our King and submitting to his Spirit's leading and power. We've learned the value of holiness, showing the culture the difference Christ makes in us. We've explored the importance of compassion as our greatest witness. Today we'll talk together about grace. Our text begins: "If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over" (Matthew 18:15). "If" is a Greek third-class subjunctive expressing the probable future: "if your brother or sister sins…and they probably will." "Brother or sister" shows that we are talking about Christians and their sins against one another. "Point out" means "bring to light" or "expose." It is a present-tense imperative, an ongoing command. If they "listen" and Dr. Jim Denison is President of the Denison Forum on Truth and Culture. Copyright © 2014-Denison Ministries. All rights reserved. For more information, see www.denisonforum.org. Page 1
accept what we say, we have "won them over." However, "if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses'" (v. 16). "Take" is a presenttense imperative, requiring obedience. "Every matter may be established" quotes Deuteronomy 19:15, instruction which prevented prosecution on the basis of a single witness's testimony. Then, "if they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax-collector" (v. 17). Begin with the person, then escalate as necessary. Jesus continues: "Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven" (v. 18). This statement does not indicate that we can "bind" and "loose" in heaven, but that our actions indicate what heaven has already done and revealed through the church. "Bind" and "loose" have neuter objects and thus refer to the decision of the church, not the person whose guilt is in question. In other words, what the church decides is sin ("binds") was already decided in heaven and revealed to the church; whatever the church decides is not sin ("looses") was already decided in heaven and revealed to God's people. The church does not "bind" and "loose" people, but pronounces on their actions. Our community matters: "Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them" (vs. 19-20). We are the "body of Christ." When we sin against each other, we sin against him. Jesus asked Saul of Tarsus on the road to Damascus, "Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?" Later he said, "I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting" (Acts 9:4, 5). What happens to us, happens to our Lord.
Why choose grace? So Jesus clearly calls us to forgive those who hurt us, to take the initiative in seeking reconciliation with them. Why should we do this? One: to receive forgiveness. Peter wanted to know how often he must offer such forgiveness. The rabbis recommended three times; he must have thought that he was being generous. Here's Jesus' answer: 77 times. Seven was the eternal number; 77 times was a metaphor for "forever." Then he told "the parable of the unmerciful servant" (vs. 21-35). A man "owed him ten thousand bags of gold," literally "ten thousand talents." A talent was 20 years' wages for a common laborer, 200,000 years' wages. But when the man asked his master to forgive his debt, the man did. In turn, the man had a servant who owed a few hundred denarii (roughly $20). But he imprisoned him until he should pay the debt (a common practice in many parts of the world). As a result, his master imprisoned him until he should pay his unpayable debt. Dr. Jim Denison is President of the Denison Forum on Truth and Culture. Copyright © 2014-Denison Ministries. All rights reserved. For more information, see www.denisonforum.org. Page 2
Our grace does not earn God's grace. Rather, it positions us to receive what God intends to give. If I will not forgive you, my heart is so far from God that I cannot receive his forgiveness. Two: to obey your Lord. Scripture is clear: "When you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him" (Mark 11:25). "If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, 'I repent,' forgive him" (Luke 17:4). "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you" (Ephesians 4:32). "Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you" (Colossians 3:13). Three: to stop your personal cycle of pain. God offers you a ticket off the roller coaster of hurt. But you must extend mercy to receive it. You see, if you give back what others give to you, you are constantly their victim. They pitch—you catch. You're trapped by your circumstances. Your soul is a genie in their bottle—how they rub it determines who you are. If you refuse to pardon the person who hurt you, he hurts you still. Every time you plot your revenge you feel again your pain. Every time you nurse your pain you increase it. The person who hurt you may not even know you're harboring your grudge and wounding your soul. He or she may have gone on with life. You're hurting no one more than yourself. But you can stop today. Here's a fourth reason: to show others the love of Christ. In a world that rejects our faith, they have no defense for our grace. Jesus identified one characteristic as a guarantee that others will know we love him: "By this all men will know you are my disciples, if you have love one for another" (John 13:35). Forgiving, pardoning, releasing love proves that God's love in us is real. During the depths of the Cold War, people in a particular East German town began throwing their trash over the Berlin Wall into the West German town on the other side. The West Germans, for their part, responded by tossing food and clothes to the East Germans. With this note: "Each gives what he has."
How do we choose grace? So, what is it to forgive others? What does this mean? How do we do it? Forgiving is not forgetting. God can forgive our confessed sins and forget them. In fact, he does: Isaiah 43:25 promises that he "remembers them no more." But you and I cannot do this. Human beings cannot simply reformat the disk or erase the tape. You can pull the nail out of your soul, but the hole remains. Dr. Jim Denison is President of the Denison Forum on Truth and Culture. Copyright © 2014-Denison Ministries. All rights reserved. For more information, see www.denisonforum.org. Page 3
Forgiving is not excusing the behavior which hurt you. The person chose to do that which hurts you today. Forgiving is not pretending that you're not hurt. You can carry on, but the pain remains and often grows. Forgiving is not tolerating. You may have to tolerate your employer, or your sibling, or your son-in-law. That doesn't mean that you've forgiven him. To forgive is to pardon. It is to refuse to punish, even though you have every right to do so. It is the governor pardoning the criminal—he doesn't forget about the crime, or excuse it, or pretend it didn't occur, or tolerate the behavior. He simply chooses not to punish, though he could. How do we do this? First, admit the reality of your hurt. Name it honestly and specifically. Describe in words how you feel about it and the person who caused it. Describe even what you would like to do in revenge. Get your feelings out, as openly and transparently as possible. You may want to put them on paper. Write a letter to the one who hurt you, then tear it up. You may want to talk to a friend you trust, or a Christian counselor. Most of all, admit it to God. As someone said, "Tell God on them." Pour out your pain and hurt. You must admit the cancer exists before the surgeon can help you. Second, ask God to help you pardon the one who hurt you. You are not expected to offer grace without Jesus' help. Turn to the Holy Spirit who dwells in your heart and soul. Ask him for the power and pardon of God. Ask him for ability to see this person as he does. And to see yourself as he does—both of you redeemed sinners. Ask him to help you give to your enemy the mercy God has given to you. And act as though he has. Don't feel yourself into a new way of acting—act yourself into a new way of feeling. Step out by faith. Every time the pain wells up inside your heart again, tell yourself again that you have released this person from the prison of their sin. That the ink on the pardon is dry, the deed is done, the forgiveness made. Third, initiate restoration. With God's help, act in courage. Tell the person honestly what they did to you, and how much this pain has hurt you. They may not even know their injustice, or comprehend its severity. If I hurt you, I want to know it. I want you to talk to me, not about me. And I to you. Go to the person in question, with honesty. Tell this person that you have pardoned him. He may not understand what you mean, or believe it, or accept it. She may never reciprocate what you have done. This is not yours to decide. You must begin the process of healing the relationship, whatever your partner in restoration decides to do. And find an honest way to a new relationship. To forgive is not to be naïve. It is not to allow an unrepentant, unchanged person to hurt you yet again. Neither is it to assume that they will never change. Seek a wise balance with the wisdom God gives to know what and where you can trust. You may never have the old relationship, but you can Dr. Jim Denison is President of the Denison Forum on Truth and Culture. Copyright © 2014-Denison Ministries. All rights reserved. For more information, see www.denisonforum.org. Page 4
have a new one by the mercy of God. Last, be realistic. We humans forgive slowly, a little at a time, usually with anger left over. One day at a time. Remind yourself that you have forgiven as many times as the pain comes back. And over time, it will come back less. And one day, perhaps, not at all. Conclusion So, who needs your forgiveness today? To forgive, you must first be forgiven. You cannot give what you have never received. Have you asked Jesus to forgive your sins, to pardon your failures, to be your Savior and Lord? He's waiting to do just that for you, right now. And to help you give his forgiveness to the person most in need of this gift from you. Where will you begin this week?
Dr. Jim Denison is President of the Denison Forum on Truth and Culture. Copyright © 2014-Denison Ministries. All rights reserved. For more information, see www.denisonforum.org. Page 5
March Madness is all in the news, as college basketball playoffs begin. Perhaps you've heard of the "Warren Buffett $1 Billion Challenge"—if a person correctly predicted all 67 games of the playoffs, he or she would win $1 billion. Some 8.7 million people entered. As of today, all of them are out. None has predicted each game correctly. Many people think God is like Warren Buffett—if you make a mistake, you can never again experience his perfect will. His plan for us is like a high wire; once you fall off, you can never get back on. The truth is just the opposite: God forgives all we confess, by grace. Now he wants us to extend his forgiveness to a world in desperate need of such love. Who is the person who has hurt you most deeply or recently? Who is the person you think of first when I ask you for someone you need to forgive? Let's ask Jesus to help us do just that.
Choose grace We've been discussing ways to bless our broken world, to respond to the rising rejection of Christianity in our day. We've noted Richard Dawkins' claim that "religion is the root of all evil" and Christopher Hitchens' assertion that "religion poisons everything." Last Monday I spoke on this subject to a pastors' group in Dallas. Afterwards, one of them told me about the atheist group in Rowlett that is attacking his church. Another told me that a local grocery store refused to recognize their tax-exempt status, simply because they are a church. How do we make a difference in a culture like this? Matthew 18 contains Jesus' instructions to his disciples on the way to his crucifixion and their persecution. The principles that prepared them will prepare us. We've learned so far the importance of humility, trusting Jesus every day as our King and submitting to his Spirit's leading and power. We've learned the value of holiness, showing the culture the difference Christ makes in us. We've explored the importance of compassion as our greatest witness. Today we'll talk together about grace. Our text begins: "If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over" (Matthew 18:15). "If" is a Greek third-class subjunctive expressing the probable future: "if your brother or sister sins…and they probably will." "Brother or sister" shows that we are talking about Christians and their sins against one another. "Point out" means "bring to light" or "expose." It is a present-tense imperative, an ongoing command. If they "listen" and Dr. Jim Denison is President of the Denison Forum on Truth and Culture. Copyright © 2014-Denison Ministries. All rights reserved. For more information, see www.denisonforum.org. Page 1
accept what we say, we have "won them over." However, "if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses'" (v. 16). "Take" is a presenttense imperative, requiring obedience. "Every matter may be established" quotes Deuteronomy 19:15, instruction which prevented prosecution on the basis of a single witness's testimony. Then, "if they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax-collector" (v. 17). Begin with the person, then escalate as necessary. Jesus continues: "Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven" (v. 18). This statement does not indicate that we can "bind" and "loose" in heaven, but that our actions indicate what heaven has already done and revealed through the church. "Bind" and "loose" have neuter objects and thus refer to the decision of the church, not the person whose guilt is in question. In other words, what the church decides is sin ("binds") was already decided in heaven and revealed to the church; whatever the church decides is not sin ("looses") was already decided in heaven and revealed to God's people. The church does not "bind" and "loose" people, but pronounces on their actions. Our community matters: "Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them" (vs. 19-20). We are the "body of Christ." When we sin against each other, we sin against him. Jesus asked Saul of Tarsus on the road to Damascus, "Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?" Later he said, "I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting" (Acts 9:4, 5). What happens to us, happens to our Lord.
Why choose grace? So Jesus clearly calls us to forgive those who hurt us, to take the initiative in seeking reconciliation with them. Why should we do this? One: to receive forgiveness. Peter wanted to know how often he must offer such forgiveness. The rabbis recommended three times; he must have thought that he was being generous. Here's Jesus' answer: 77 times. Seven was the eternal number; 77 times was a metaphor for "forever." Then he told "the parable of the unmerciful servant" (vs. 21-35). A man "owed him ten thousand bags of gold," literally "ten thousand talents." A talent was 20 years' wages for a common laborer, 200,000 years' wages. But when the man asked his master to forgive his debt, the man did. In turn, the man had a servant who owed a few hundred denarii (roughly $20). But he imprisoned him until he should pay the debt (a common practice in many parts of the world). As a result, his master imprisoned him until he should pay his unpayable debt. Dr. Jim Denison is President of the Denison Forum on Truth and Culture. Copyright © 2014-Denison Ministries. All rights reserved. For more information, see www.denisonforum.org. Page 2
Our grace does not earn God's grace. Rather, it positions us to receive what God intends to give. If I will not forgive you, my heart is so far from God that I cannot receive his forgiveness. Two: to obey your Lord. Scripture is clear: "When you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him" (Mark 11:25). "If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, 'I repent,' forgive him" (Luke 17:4). "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you" (Ephesians 4:32). "Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you" (Colossians 3:13). Three: to stop your personal cycle of pain. God offers you a ticket off the roller coaster of hurt. But you must extend mercy to receive it. You see, if you give back what others give to you, you are constantly their victim. They pitch—you catch. You're trapped by your circumstances. Your soul is a genie in their bottle—how they rub it determines who you are. If you refuse to pardon the person who hurt you, he hurts you still. Every time you plot your revenge you feel again your pain. Every time you nurse your pain you increase it. The person who hurt you may not even know you're harboring your grudge and wounding your soul. He or she may have gone on with life. You're hurting no one more than yourself. But you can stop today. Here's a fourth reason: to show others the love of Christ. In a world that rejects our faith, they have no defense for our grace. Jesus identified one characteristic as a guarantee that others will know we love him: "By this all men will know you are my disciples, if you have love one for another" (John 13:35). Forgiving, pardoning, releasing love proves that God's love in us is real. During the depths of the Cold War, people in a particular East German town began throwing their trash over the Berlin Wall into the West German town on the other side. The West Germans, for their part, responded by tossing food and clothes to the East Germans. With this note: "Each gives what he has."
How do we choose grace? So, what is it to forgive others? What does this mean? How do we do it? Forgiving is not forgetting. God can forgive our confessed sins and forget them. In fact, he does: Isaiah 43:25 promises that he "remembers them no more." But you and I cannot do this. Human beings cannot simply reformat the disk or erase the tape. You can pull the nail out of your soul, but the hole remains. Dr. Jim Denison is President of the Denison Forum on Truth and Culture. Copyright © 2014-Denison Ministries. All rights reserved. For more information, see www.denisonforum.org. Page 3
Forgiving is not excusing the behavior which hurt you. The person chose to do that which hurts you today. Forgiving is not pretending that you're not hurt. You can carry on, but the pain remains and often grows. Forgiving is not tolerating. You may have to tolerate your employer, or your sibling, or your son-in-law. That doesn't mean that you've forgiven him. To forgive is to pardon. It is to refuse to punish, even though you have every right to do so. It is the governor pardoning the criminal—he doesn't forget about the crime, or excuse it, or pretend it didn't occur, or tolerate the behavior. He simply chooses not to punish, though he could. How do we do this? First, admit the reality of your hurt. Name it honestly and specifically. Describe in words how you feel about it and the person who caused it. Describe even what you would like to do in revenge. Get your feelings out, as openly and transparently as possible. You may want to put them on paper. Write a letter to the one who hurt you, then tear it up. You may want to talk to a friend you trust, or a Christian counselor. Most of all, admit it to God. As someone said, "Tell God on them." Pour out your pain and hurt. You must admit the cancer exists before the surgeon can help you. Second, ask God to help you pardon the one who hurt you. You are not expected to offer grace without Jesus' help. Turn to the Holy Spirit who dwells in your heart and soul. Ask him for the power and pardon of God. Ask him for ability to see this person as he does. And to see yourself as he does—both of you redeemed sinners. Ask him to help you give to your enemy the mercy God has given to you. And act as though he has. Don't feel yourself into a new way of acting—act yourself into a new way of feeling. Step out by faith. Every time the pain wells up inside your heart again, tell yourself again that you have released this person from the prison of their sin. That the ink on the pardon is dry, the deed is done, the forgiveness made. Third, initiate restoration. With God's help, act in courage. Tell the person honestly what they did to you, and how much this pain has hurt you. They may not even know their injustice, or comprehend its severity. If I hurt you, I want to know it. I want you to talk to me, not about me. And I to you. Go to the person in question, with honesty. Tell this person that you have pardoned him. He may not understand what you mean, or believe it, or accept it. She may never reciprocate what you have done. This is not yours to decide. You must begin the process of healing the relationship, whatever your partner in restoration decides to do. And find an honest way to a new relationship. To forgive is not to be naïve. It is not to allow an unrepentant, unchanged person to hurt you yet again. Neither is it to assume that they will never change. Seek a wise balance with the wisdom God gives to know what and where you can trust. You may never have the old relationship, but you can Dr. Jim Denison is President of the Denison Forum on Truth and Culture. Copyright © 2014-Denison Ministries. All rights reserved. For more information, see www.denisonforum.org. Page 4
have a new one by the mercy of God. Last, be realistic. We humans forgive slowly, a little at a time, usually with anger left over. One day at a time. Remind yourself that you have forgiven as many times as the pain comes back. And over time, it will come back less. And one day, perhaps, not at all. Conclusion So, who needs your forgiveness today? To forgive, you must first be forgiven. You cannot give what you have never received. Have you asked Jesus to forgive your sins, to pardon your failures, to be your Savior and Lord? He's waiting to do just that for you, right now. And to help you give his forgiveness to the person most in need of this gift from you. Where will you begin this week?
Dr. Jim Denison is President of the Denison Forum on Truth and Culture. Copyright © 2014-Denison Ministries. All rights reserved. For more information, see www.denisonforum.org. Page 5
