MONEY MATTERS 101: A NEWLYWED COUPLE'S GUIDE TO YOUR ...

MONEY  MATTERS  101:  A  NEWLYWED     COUPLE’S  GUIDE  TO  YOUR  DOMESTIC   FINANCIAL  BLISS  

  Congratulations  on  your  recent  engagement!  This  is  truly  a  blissful  time  for  both  of   you,  as  it  is  a  time  to  rejoice  and  celebrate  the  news  of  your  upcoming  wedding!    I   cannot   be   happier   for   you   as   a   couple,   for   your   mutual   love,   respect,   and   courage   to   enter   into   this   wonderful   institution   called   marriage.   Your   engagement   shows   just   how   ready   you   are   to   live   a   life   together,   to   share   both   happiness   and   sorrow,   the   good  and  the  bad  in  between,  together  as  one.     Marriage   is   certainly   an   amazing   experience   one   has   the   opportunity   to   undergo,   with  the  right  partner,  of  course.  There  are  many,  many  issues  out  there  a  married   couple   can   face,   like   money   for   instance;   but   with   the   right   tools   and   strategies   to   guide   you   and   your   partner,   marriage   can   be   an   enjoyable   breeze   that   you   can   go   through  in  your  life.     Today,  love  is  rarely  the  only  basis  why  a  marriage  is  considered  successful.  Other   factors  come  in,  and  topping  off  that  list  is  money.    Money  can  be  one  of  the  greatest   factors   that   determine   a   successful   marriage.   Often,   money,   or   the   lack   thereof,   is   and   can   be   the   source   of   stress   for   most   marriages,   resulting   in   the   relationship   floundering  and  ultimately  having  troubles.  

  However,  and  fear  not!  With  proper  communication  and  financial  planning,  couples   can  start  off  their  marriage  financially  sound  and  stable,  and  carry  on  without  any   hitch,  if  sensible  tips  and  strategies  are  followed,  which  I  will  share  with  you.       This   mini-­‐book   will   serve   as   a   guide   you   and   your   partner   can   read   and   follow   to   achieve  domestic  financial  bliss.        

                     

CHAPTER  ONE:  THE  MONEY  TALK  

    People   often   shy   away   from   this   subject,   and   more   often   than   not,   newly   engaged   couples   are   busy   arranging   their   wedding   to   even   find   the   time   to   sit   and   have   a   conversation   about   money.     But   I   will   stress   this,   having   a   serious   conversation   about  money  is  important  for  newly  engaged  couples.  You  and  your  partner  should   talk  about  your  dreams  and  goals,  and  how  you  will  handle  your  finances  once  you   start  your  married  life.     Lay   all   your   cards   on   the   table.   Have   a   frank   and   open   financial   conversation,   and   disclose   all   your   assets   and   debts   before   your   wedding.   Clear   and   open   communication,   especially   regarding   finances,   is   very   vital   to   determine   the   success   of  your  union.       The   first   thing   you   should   do   is   to   analyze   your   money   compatibility.   Understand   each   other’s   money   management   style,   discuss   pros   and   cons,   combine   and   create   an  approach  that  would  work  best  for  you  as  a  couple.     How  does  your  fiancé  spend  his  money?  Is  he  a  conservative  spender?  Are  you?  Its   certainly  a  good  thing  if  both  of  you  are  conservative  spenders.  Most  financial  issues   would   be   easily   solved   if   both   of   you   have   the   same   perspective   when   it   comes   to   spending  and  saving  money.     But,   not   all   couples   are   that   lucky..   and   so,   the   best   way   is   to   sit   down   with   your   partner  and  have  the  money  talk,  like  how  you’re  going  to  handle  your  money  after   the   wedding,   debts   you   have   incurred   and   how   you’re   going   to   pay   for   it,   how   to   save,   where   to   put   your   money   in,   budgeting,   and   all   the   little   financial   details   a   marriage  will  entail.     I   will   stress   this   again,   having   that   discussion   is   an   essential   step   to   establishing   success   in   your   undertaking   of   a   successful   marriage.   Avoiding   this   conversation   will   only   guarantee   a   lot   of   misunderstandings,   headaches,   and   the   inevitable   arguments   in   the   future.   Get   it   over   with   now,   while   you’re   just   on   the   verge   of   starting.     Having   the   talk   will   clear   the   air   out   and   put   you   both   in   the   same   mind   to   travel   the   fast   track  to  domestic  financial  bliss.  

   

CHAPTER  TWO:  TALK  ABOUT  MONEY  WITHOUT  KILLING  EACH   OTHER     It’s   a   widely   known   fact   that   money   is   one   of   the   main   causes   of   marital   strife,   if   not   the   number   one!   Many   couples   are   hesitant   to   talk   about   their   finances,   and   their   reluctance  will  lead  to  the  start  of  problems.     You   see,   when   one   partner   is   reluctant  to  talk  about  money,  maybe   because   talking   about   money   evokes   feelings   of   discomfort,   resentment,   or   inadequacy,   these   feelings   will   make   the   partner   start   off   on   a   negative   vibe.   Meanwhile,   the   other   partner   will   also   feel   all   sorts   of   negative   vibes,  like  frustration  and  resentment   because   of   the   other’s   reluctance   to   talk.   Therefore,   both   parties   will   pick   up   on   each   other’s   negative-­‐ness   and   a  fight  is  bound  to  ensue.       But  how  do  you  talk  to  your  partner  without  wanting  to  kill  each  other?     The  best  way  to  talk  about  money  is  to  do  everything  as  a  team.  From  experience,   one   cause   of   fights   is   one   partner   spending   far   too   much   than   what   the   other   considers  to  be  enough.  To  resolve  this,  it’s  a  good  idea  to  create  a  budget  together,   compromise,   and   agree   to   follow   what   you   both   put   down   on   your   agreed   budget.   Each   partner   has   an   input   in   the   creation   of   your   budget,   and   that   will   make   both   feel  part  of  the  team,  and  not  create  resentment  that  the  other  has  control  over  the   budget.  Do  everything  together  when  it  comes  to  your  finances.  Create  your  budget   together,   do   the   bills   together,   review   your   finances   together.   Doing   everything   together   will   make   you   both   accountable,   not   just   the   other.   By   doing   everything   together   in   the   finance   department,   you   will   avoid   the   pitfalls   of   misunderstandings   and  miscommunication  when  it  comes  to  your  budgeting.     Lastly,   talk   to   each   other   in   a   calm   manner.   Money   is   a   serious   issue,   and   it   can   only   get  worse  when  raised  voices  and  accusations  come  into  the  discussion.  Nothing  will   get  solved  with  anger  and  recriminations.     Always   remember   that   your   money   conversations   are   there   to   ensure   that   your   future  as  a  married  couple  is  as  stable  as  you  can  make  it  to  be.      

CHAPTER  THREE:  PRE-­‐WEDDING  MONEY  CONVERSATION  

    Getting   engaged   is   so   wonderful   that   it   is   so   hard   not   to   get   caught   up   in   the   moment,   but   that   is   exactly   what   you   should   not   do!   This   is   a   time   to   get   realistic   and  practical,  and  it  is  essential  that  you  both  sit  down  and  have  a  talk  about  your   wedding  expenses.  It  is  important  that  you  set  a  realistic  budget  for  your  wedding,   whether  you  decide  to  pay  for  it  mutually  or  not.     An   understanding   about   your   wedding   budget   should   be   reached,   like   how   much   you  are  both  willing  to  pay  for  the  details  you  want  in  your  wedding,  who  is  paying   for  the  flowers,  food,  and  so  on.  List  down  all  that  you  have  agreed  upon,  and  most   of   all,   be   reasonable   in   setting   your   budget.   Doing   so   will   avoid   unnecessary   spending,  debts,  and  most  of  all,  unnecessary  fights  along  the  way.     Be  sure  to  express  what  you  expect  and  what  really  matters  to  each  of  you  on  your   special  day.  Do  you  want  a  big,  fabulous  dress?  Magnificent  rings?  An  awesome  and   wonderful  honeymoon?  Or  a  gorgeous  ceremony  and  reception?  It  would  certainly   be   great   if   you   can   afford   it   all,   but   if   not,   its   ideal   and   essential   to   discuss   what   part   of  the  wedding  is  important  to  you,  and  what  part  you’re  willing  to  compromise  on   to  save  some  money.       Remember   that   weddings   are   precious   moments   and   are   a   once   in   a   lifetime   event,   you   don’t   want   to   look   back   on   it   and   regret   anything   you   did  or  didn’t  do.        

       

CHAPTER  FOUR:  AFTER  THE  WEDDING    

  Congratulations   on   making   it   through   the   wedding   fever!   Now   it’s   time   to   settle   down,   and   straighten   out   your   finances.   This   is   the   start   of   the   adjustment   period,   and   in   this   period   you   should   figure   out   how   your   finances   are   going   to   work   together.     Money  conversations  at  this  stage  should  be  about  how  you  are  going  to  merge  your   money,  who  will  pay  for  the  bills  and  debts,  and  such  other  financial  issues.     Traditionally,  newly  married  couples  create  joint  accounts  for  household  items,  bills,   savings   and   emergency   funds,   and   separate   accounts   for   your   own   personal   spending.   Separate   accounts   for   personal   use   are   ideal   and   can   eliminate   a   lot   of   arguments   and   fights   with   one   partner   getting   mad   at   the   other   over   unnecessary   purchases.     It  is  essential  that  you  both  sit  down  and  have  a  look  through  your  resources  at  least   once  a  month  for  you  to  both  have  a  clear  view  of  your  financial  situation.  This  will   also  make  sure  that  both  of  you  are  sticking  to  your  agreed  budget  and  that  you’re   both  working  in  the  same  direction  with  regards  to  your  financial  goals.          

CHAPTER  FIVE:  ENSURE  DOMESTIC  FINANCIAL  BLISS  WITH  THIS   E-­‐BOOK     Marriage   is   an   enjoyable   institution,   and   it   is   meant   to   be   enjoyed!   -­‐     Especially   in   the   first   few   years   of   your   married   life.   One   way   to   ensure   this   is   to   open   your   communication  lines  and  talk  about  the  serious  issues  like  money  early  on.     Financial   success   in   your   marriage   is   achieved   through   cooperating   with   each   other   in  reaching  your  goals,  guaranteeing  fewer  arguments  and  fights  about  money  and   finances.  Also,  following  the  advice  given  in  this  book  is  a  sure-­‐fire  way  of  steering   clear   of   problems   and   misunderstandings   that   might   beset   your   union   in   its   early   stages,  thereby  assuring  the  success  of  your  marriage.        

                 

 

CHAPTER  SIX:  A  NEWLYWED  COUPLE’S  1ST  YEAR  FINANCIAL   CHECKLIST       Below   is   a   financial   checklist   a   couple   should   undertake   to   follow   during   the   first   year  of  their  marriage.     √    Create  a  budget.     -­‐  Make  a  list  of  all  expenses  and  income  coming  in,  allocate  funds  to  go  with   what  (i.e  bills,  savings,  groceries).     √    Pay  off  your  debts.     -­‐   Debts   incurred   during   your   wedding   preparations,   etc.   should   be   settled.   Come  up  with  a  payment  scheme  if  need  be.     √    Designate  financial  responsibilities.     -­‐  Who  pays  for  what?  An  ideal  solution  would  be  to  open  a  joint  account  so   that  all  financial  responsibilities  as  a  married  couple  would  be  met.     √    Update  wills  and  insurance.   -­‐  Update  all  your  important  documents  like  your  will,  your  beneficiary  listed   on  your  insurance,  bank  accounts,  or  the  changing  of  your  surname.       √    Start  an  emergency  fund.     -­‐   Faithfully   place   a   percentage   of   your   earnings   into   an   emergency   fund,   so   that  you  can  be  prepared  for  anything.     √    Set  financial  goals.     -­‐  Have  a  discussion  about  that  you  both  want  out  of  life,  i.e  a  new  house,  the   number  of  children  you  will  have,  your  retirement  plans  to  determine  the  steps  your   have  to  take  in  order  to  achieve  them.     √  Personal  Budgeting  Specialist.     -­‐    Seek  the  help  of  a  personal  budgeting  specialist  who  specializes  in  working   with  newlyweds  to  help  you  with  your  financial  needs.