Detectives in Togas By Henry Winterfeld Dictation passages Week One: Opening Lines Mucius raised his head in surprise. The entire class had suddenly gone off into gales of laughter, and he did not know why. He has been concentrating on his work and had not noticed what was happening in the classroom. Now he saw that Rufus had left his seat and was standing near the wall, behind their teacher, Xantippus. (Chapter 1) Why I chose this passage: The beginning of this schoolroom prank gives us insight into the main characters and their personalities. Boys will be boys, after all—even in ancient Rome. What to note: Comma usage is the tricky part of this passage. Notice that the second sentence contains a comma, but the third sentence doesn't. Why is this so? The second sentence contains two independent clauses (containing a subject, a verb, and a complete thought) joined by a coordinating conjunction (and, but, fo r, o r, nor, yet, so). A comma is to precede the coordinating conjunction when two independent clauses are joined in this way. However, the third sentence does not contain two independent clauses; rather, the second part of the sentence is lacking a subject. Therefore, since we end up with a compound verb in this sentence (subject:he; verbs:has been concentrating and had [not] noticed), no comma is required. A comma is also used before the teacher's name, Xantippus. In this case, “Xantippus” is an appositive (a common or proper noun renaming “teacher”), and commas are to both precede and follow an appositive. But since the appositive “Xantippus” is at the very end of the sentence and thus is followed by a period, only the preceding comma is used. How to teach the passage: This passage is quite straightforward, except for a few challenging spelling words: surprise, laughter, concentrating, happening. Also work with the spellings of the characters' very Roman/Greek names, in this case “Mucius,” “Rufus,” and Xantippus.” We discover a few pages later that “Xantippus” is not the teacher's real name but rather the boys' nickname for their Greek teacher, Xanthos, as he “nags” his students, insisting on “hard work and perfect conduct.” Xantippus will be a major character as this mystery unfolds, so noting these seemingly insignificant details will be important later on.
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Week Two: Dialog “But Rufus did do it,” Mucius said. Claudia stared at him, her big eyes rounded in amazement. “Caius insulted Rufus' father,” Mucius explained, “and they had a fight. This all happened in school.” “Rufus wrote 'Caius is a dumbbell' on a writing tablet yesterday,” Julius added. (Chapter 5) Why I chose this passage: There are some important points of dialog punctuation in this passage; plus it's entertaining to follow the way the students' minds work as they attempt to unravel the mysterious occurrences involving their classmates and teacher. What to note: Dialog punctuation can be complex, so it's important to practice it often with our students until punctuating dialogs becomes second nature to them. As we can see in this passage, periods and commas belong inside closing quotation marks. We also start a new paragraph, indicated by indenting, to show a change of speaker. Notice also that we have a more unusual situation in the last sentence of this passage: a quotation within a quotation. Julius is speaking, and he quotes the message on the tablet: “Caius is a dumbbell.” In a non-dialog sentence like the one I just wrote, we place the quoted message in double quotation marks, as usual. However, as the words Julius speaks are already in standard double quotation marks, we change the quoted message to single quotation marks to indicate that these words are being quoted by the speaker. (In Standard British English, the dialog passages use single quotation marks, and quotations within quotations utilize double quotation marks—the opposite of Standard American English. Keep this fact in mind if you are reading books printed in the UK or other places outside of the US.) In addition, the possessive noun in the third sentence, “Rufus' father,” only uses an apostrophe to indicate possession, rather than the standard 's, since “Rufus” ends with an s. It is acceptable to drop the s following the apostrophe, but it is not required: either way is correct—although dropping the s following the apostrophe is obviously more common with plural possessive nouns (girls') than with singular ones (Charles'). How to teach the passage: Study the spellings of the Roman names of the students mentioned in this passage: Rufus, Caius, Claudia, Mucius, Julius. Also, notice the short paragraphs (and the indentations that accompany each change of speaker) in this passage.
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Julie Bogart
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Week Three: Description Cautiously, he crawled forward. But suddenly his hands reached out into empty space; he lost his balance and fell headfirst into space. It's all over, was his last thought. The fall will kill me. Then he dropped with a loud splash into water and sank like a stone. (Chapter 12) Why I chose this passage: This passage is exciting as Mucius finds himself in a dangerous position, thinking that he's going to die but finding himself miraculously safe after all. What to note: The second sentence contains a semicolon—a piece of punctuation that many students (and even some adults) find a little daunting. But semicolons are not the enigma they are often considered to be. In this case, the semicolon separates two independent clauses (groups of words containing a subject, a verb, creating a complete thought) just as a comma and coordinating conjunction (and, but, for, or, nor, yet, so) often do. But semicolons are used between two closely-related independent clauses, and they keep the sentences flowing more smoothly and naturally than separating the independent clauses into separate simple sentences. In addition, semicolons add a touch of sophistication to writing, so they are a very nice piece of punctuation to pull out of our pockets at opportune moments. A comma for emphasis often follows introductory words in a sentence, such as “Cautiously” in the first sentence. How to teach the passage: Mucius' thoughts are italicized in this passage, a common way of distinguishing thoughts from spoken words—which are enclosed in quotation marks. When students copy italicized words in their own handwriting, they should underline the italicized words. Underlining and italicizing words mean the same thing, but in handwriting (and on old-fashioned typewriters), italicizing words wasn't possible, so underlining took its place. The final sentence contains an excellent example of a simile (a comparison using the words “like” or “as”): “like a stone.” Week Four: Closing The boys were thunderstruck; they had never seen their teacher laugh before. Xantippus laughed until the tears ran down his cheeks. When his laughter began to subside, he wiped his eyes and said, still chuckling: “Caius, you really are a dumbbell!” (Chapter 22) Why I chose this passage: Just as the book opened with laughter, so it also closes with laughter, this time the laughter of the serious teacher rather than the raucous laughter of his students—both times laughter over the same phrase: “Caius is a dumbbell.” And the ending sentences of almost every book is somehow memorable—as this one definitely is.
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Julie Bogart
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7723 Tylers Place Blvd. #165
• West Chester, OH 45069
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What to note: Again we notice the use of a semicolon in this passage, separating two closely-related independent clauses—groups of words containing a subject, a verb, and a complete thought. In addition to the semicolon, notice also the use of a colon in the final sentence of this passage. Colons and semicolons are not interchangeable; they each have specific uses in making writing concise and clear. In this case, the colon signals that an explanation is following. So, uses of the colon include: preceding a list, preceding a long quotation, preceding an explanation, following the salutation of a business letter, and also between chapter and verse in a biblical citation, between hours and minutes, and between titles and subtitles. How to teach this passage: In the quotation at the end of the passage, the final exclamation point belongs inside the closing quotation marks. While periods and commas always belong inside closing quotation marks, question marks and exclamation points usually (about 90% of time time) belong inside closing quotation marks as well—and this sentence belongs to the vast majority. Also, the first comma in the last sentence is important. In a complex sentence (consisting of an independent clause and one or more dependent clauses), when the dependent clause precedes the independent clause, a comma follows the opening dependent clause. However, when the independent clause precedes the dependent clause(s), no comma is necessary.
Literary Element of the Month Cliché A cliché (pronounced klee-shay) is a phrase, a saying, or an expression that has become overused to the point that it has lost its meaning, freshness, and power. Writing clichés is not usually considered to be effective writing as we want our writing to be everything that a cliché is not: we want writing to be fresh and powerful, packed with meaning. As a result, most writers should “avoid clichés like the plague”—as the old cliché goes. However, clichés may be used effectively at times in humorous writing. Clichés are not necessarily untrue; in fact, they are often quite true. Originally, clichés were truthful, striking phrases—powerful phrases that lost their freshness and meaning through overuse. A cliché was once a vivid comparison and/or exaggeration that through being used over and over (and over and over) has lost its force and freshness—and often its original meaning. The origin of the word “cliché” is fascinating. Wikipedia informs us: “In printing, a cliché was a printing plate cast from movable type. This is also called a stereotype. When letters were set one at a time, it made sense to cast a phrase used repeatedly as a single slug of metal. 'Cliché' came to mean such a ready-made phrase. The French word 'cliché' comes from the sound made when the matrix is dropped into molten metal to make a printing plate.” It's interesting that both words “cliché” and “stereotype” (which are very similar in meaning) come from the printing press process. Examples: Clichés are everywhere. You can probably jot down a formidable list on your own, but I'll provide the beginning of a list for you. (Notice how many of these clichés are similes: comparisons using the words “like” or “as”.) Feel free to add some of your favorite clichés to the list below.
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Julie Bogart
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7723 Tylers Place Blvd. #165
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out of the frying pan and into the fire the pot calling the kettle black steal his thunder kill him with kindness spitting image too close for comfort head over heels dark of night dead as a doornail stubborn as a mule tough as nails diamond in the rough water under the bridge kick up your heels easy as pie marriage made in heaven time heals all wounds let sleeping dogs lie between a rock and a hard place the whole nine yards Discuss the meanings of some of these clichés, plus some of the ones you've added to this list yourself. What do they refer to? What is being compared? How are they used in speech/writing? Can you trace the origins of some of them (like do you know why we say “the whole nine yards”)? Clichés in Context It helps us to understand the cliché better when we see it in the context of a poem or a piece of prose. One poet who loved to play with clichés is Ogden Nash, a writer of light and humorous verse. This is the first stanza of a poem called “Goody for Our Side and Your Side Too” by Ogden Nash—with clichés underlined: Foreigners are people somewhere else, Natives are people at home; If the place you're at Is your habitat, You're a foreigner, say, in Rome. But the scales of Justice balance true, And tit leads into tat, So the man who's at home When he stays in Rome Is abroad when he's where you're at. Karen O’Conno r, Julie Bogart’s mother (professional writer and writing instructor) wrote the following playful piece about cliché use in writing: As a professional writer I think about words–a lot–as well as what they mean. Although I try to be original in my expression and provide my readers with fresh images and ways of looking at life, I too often catch myself using clichés. I guess you JUST CAN'T TEACH AN OLD DOG NEW TRICKS. Oops! There I go again. It's AS EASY AS PIE! My son
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Julie Bogart
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7723 Tylers Place Blvd. #165
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Jim and I talked about this topic on his recent visit, since he, too, is a writer. Once we got started on the topic we couldn't stop. Our conversation was suddenly a MIXED BAG of time-worn phrases and often we didn't even know what they meant or where they came from. As much as we tried to AVOID THEM LIKE THE PLAGUE, the more they sprang from our lips. I tried to be as QUIET AS A MOUSE so I wouldn't add to the pile of phrases that was growing BY LEAPS AND BOUNDS, but it didn't work. Soon I was UP THE CREEK WITHOUT A PADDLE. WE LAUGHED UNTIL WE CRIED, but even tears couldn't stop us. We were having MORE FUN THAN A BARREL OF MONKEYS! I have to admit I wonder just how much fun that would be. But then I also pondered what it means to be AS HAPPY AS A CLAM. That one TAKES THE CAKE! By now I feel like THROWING IN THE TOWEL, or more appropriate, THROWING THE BOOK at myself, the book of clichés, that is. On the other hand, if I do that, I'll be a SITTING DUCK, STUCK IN A RUT or UP A TREE and MADDER THAN A WET HEN, worried that I've gotten myself IN A PICKLE with MORE THAN I BARGAINED FOR! I think I've said all I have to say on this topic–at least for today–so I'm going to BEAT IT LIKE A RUG before I hit THE POINT OF NO RETURN. If this little essay RINGS YOUR CHIMES, do let me know! I'll be WAITING WITH BAITED BREATH. Or maybe to you, this is simply MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING. Either way, let me hear from you. A PENNY FOR YOUR THOUGHTS? Fun right? I found myself wondering what “baited breath” is and at what point in time we considered barrels an acceptable place to keep monkeys. Clichés are fun to identify, too. See if you can hear them in slogans, conversations or TV shows. Writing Exercise There are two ways you can explore the fun of clichés. You might string them together in much the way Ms. O’Connor did in her piece. Write a piece about the trouble with clichés in writing, using clichés. You might even write it without capitalizing the clichés and see if your mom or siblings or Dad can recognize them. A second ideas is to write a poem by stringing together as many clichés as you can—just for fun. It can look something like this (with clichés underlined): Dan was stuck between a rock and a hard place, Feeling lower than a snake on the ground, Knowing that somehow he was lost in space, He turned himself into the “Lost and Found.” Your poem may rhyme or not rhyme—may be as short as four lines or as long as you like. Try to make the poem humorous—play with the clichés, with the length of the lines. Last writing idea: For a week, keep a running list of clichés on a white board where everyone can see it. Add to it each time you hear one. At the end of the week, see how many times clichés are used in your world. You might hear them at church or on the playground. You might read them in a book or hear them in a cartoon. You might hear a cliché that has been altered. Note those too! Enjoy word play. That’s what it’s all about.
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Julie Bogart
•
7723 Tylers Place Blvd. #165
• West Chester, OH 45069
• (513) 307-1405
Detectives in Togas
©
Julie Bogart
•
7723 Tylers Place Blvd. #165
• West Chester, OH 45069
7
• (513) 307-1405